You can't always control what you feel
You don't always understand someone feeling
You might not always there when they need you
You won't always be wanted
A social matter. Something you have to be able to make it balanced. Maybe a determinant factor that makes you feel glad or sad. Social is something so familiar, we experience it daily, it sometimes so easy but on the other day it could be so complex.
Society gives us a soul to live, heart to handle, and mind to explore.
Social matters feel so natural when we use it as a reflex, just smile when we are happy, just cry when we sad, and let's scream when we're angry! Easy-peasy right?
But no, society has its rules. We can not just use your feeling without thinking, because our actions in society will affect something. Even when we do nothing, we will get your counter-effect.
For example, when you get the best mark among your classmates while lots of people got C you will not scream so loud and burst into happiness, right? And if you see somebody being hurt you won't do nothing you will help or ask him/her about his/her condition. Why? Because you know the impact. You understand that when you are too proud it will make people envy and might hurt people. Maybe you do something to help because you do not want people label you as an arrogant boy.
That's how the society work, give you a riddle and make you wonder are you doing good enough in this society. Here I bring up some social issues that I have experienced. The first one would be: lacking sense.
Have you ever read this poetry? This poetry tells us about how important to give appreciation to people.
---
Your friend gave you his bread, and you asked why he did not give you a meal like others do, you did not know that the bread was the only food he had
Your friend visited you when you were sick, and you asked why he did not bring you a medicine, you did not know that at the right time he was also sick and he did not have any money to buy himself medicine
Your friend gave importance to you, you thought he was always free, you did not know that he makes himself available for you every time.
-Anonymous
...
Yea, sometimes, we think it's okay not to appreciate people when he/she doing you a favor, but a simple "thank you" would make their day better. We think it's fine to not apologize when we do a little mistake, but what we think is "little" maybe is their "whole" life.
What to keep in mind is: Don't lose your sense, don't be an ignorant person because everyone is not thinking the same way as you, something that you feel simple maybe means a lot to them.
You understand your impact on society and the impacts that society can give on you, so you probably become afraid of doing any mistakes in society. You keep your behavior as perfectly as you can, and in the end? You end up become a marionette controlled by society, hiding your true feeling, your bravest passions, maybe that now you don't know what you should do or not do. Losing trace.
Well, the thing is you can not please anyone. So let's stop becoming a pleaser. Reducing your bad habits is fine but you actually do not need to hide or act what you actually do not want to. Even our prophet who had great akhlaq also get people hating him. Yes, we know haters gonna hate.
I have experience of this kind of situation when I want to be appreciated by the people that I care. But we really have a different world. Our personality and interest are very different and therefore we could not have a long conversation. I always feel bad around that person, because I can't act naturally in front of him, cos I am afraid he/she will have a bad opinion about me and believe me, try to fit in something really different from you is not the solution. I become exhausted of myself and I decided that I won't even care anymore. There is a circle of people we just could not fit in. There is a limitation we have so that we could not fulfill someone's expectation. And that's pretty fine. You might feel bad about yourself but now: Forgive yourself. It's not your fault, nor theirs. You just don't match each other. You just a person with imperfections.
And if somebody does not want you, there are 7,5 billion other people wandering out there. Maybe one of them needs you a lot now. yes, like..a lot.
What to keep in mind is: Let them like you for being you.
And sometimes we might feel like hoping for feedback when we do anything nice to people, but they just don't give us any. So we become more apathy to them because we learn that they never give their heart back to you. Making it worse, they don't feel any burden about it. Speaking the truth that they never care about your feeling? But hey, you make your own heartache, babe. You make expectations so that's why you feel disappointed when it does not happen. Is it wrong to make expectation? Well, it's actually natural. It depends on how we control it, just make less attention to their feedback and focus on your actions. Say to yourself: You do it because you want to. You do not need their feedback nor appreciation. You do it for you, you do nice things to make yourself happy. And that's all. You could be a little happier creature in this earth.
Believe me, someday, somewhere, and from someone you probably don't expect, your good deeds will come back to you.
Allah is the best planners.
What to keep in mind is: make less attention to people's feedback and focus on your actions.
(to be continued..
making mistakes; face problems; judging people )
Just my personal opinion as one little part of the society. Would love to hear more opinions or maybe some social experiences from you. :)
Have a good day.
Chusna A.
The World is a great mirror and reflects back to you what you are - Vibre the Proporsito
tags:
how to have and develop good social skills, how to be sociable, deal with society, ways to improve social skill, face social problem, social issues, social matters, learn social skill, become yourself, self healing, definition of society, social skill development, social life, social problem example, social problem solving, society meaning, society quotes, tips, how to handle yourself, tolerate others, become adaptable, control your feeling, forgive yourself, facing problems, make mistake, love yourself, build social lif, social experiences, social network
You don't always understand someone feeling
You might not always there when they need you
You won't always be wanted
A social matter. Something you have to be able to make it balanced. Maybe a determinant factor that makes you feel glad or sad. Social is something so familiar, we experience it daily, it sometimes so easy but on the other day it could be so complex.
Society gives us a soul to live, heart to handle, and mind to explore.
Social matters feel so natural when we use it as a reflex, just smile when we are happy, just cry when we sad, and let's scream when we're angry! Easy-peasy right?
But no, society has its rules. We can not just use your feeling without thinking, because our actions in society will affect something. Even when we do nothing, we will get your counter-effect.
For example, when you get the best mark among your classmates while lots of people got C you will not scream so loud and burst into happiness, right? And if you see somebody being hurt you won't do nothing you will help or ask him/her about his/her condition. Why? Because you know the impact. You understand that when you are too proud it will make people envy and might hurt people. Maybe you do something to help because you do not want people label you as an arrogant boy.
That's how the society work, give you a riddle and make you wonder are you doing good enough in this society. Here I bring up some social issues that I have experienced. The first one would be: lacking sense.
Have you ever read this poetry? This poetry tells us about how important to give appreciation to people.
---
Your friend gave you his bread, and you asked why he did not give you a meal like others do, you did not know that the bread was the only food he had
Your friend visited you when you were sick, and you asked why he did not bring you a medicine, you did not know that at the right time he was also sick and he did not have any money to buy himself medicine
Your friend gave importance to you, you thought he was always free, you did not know that he makes himself available for you every time.
-Anonymous
...
Yea, sometimes, we think it's okay not to appreciate people when he/she doing you a favor, but a simple "thank you" would make their day better. We think it's fine to not apologize when we do a little mistake, but what we think is "little" maybe is their "whole" life.
What to keep in mind is: Don't lose your sense, don't be an ignorant person because everyone is not thinking the same way as you, something that you feel simple maybe means a lot to them.
You understand your impact on society and the impacts that society can give on you, so you probably become afraid of doing any mistakes in society. You keep your behavior as perfectly as you can, and in the end? You end up become a marionette controlled by society, hiding your true feeling, your bravest passions, maybe that now you don't know what you should do or not do. Losing trace.
Well, the thing is you can not please anyone. So let's stop becoming a pleaser. Reducing your bad habits is fine but you actually do not need to hide or act what you actually do not want to. Even our prophet who had great akhlaq also get people hating him. Yes, we know haters gonna hate.
I have experience of this kind of situation when I want to be appreciated by the people that I care. But we really have a different world. Our personality and interest are very different and therefore we could not have a long conversation. I always feel bad around that person, because I can't act naturally in front of him, cos I am afraid he/she will have a bad opinion about me and believe me, try to fit in something really different from you is not the solution. I become exhausted of myself and I decided that I won't even care anymore. There is a circle of people we just could not fit in. There is a limitation we have so that we could not fulfill someone's expectation. And that's pretty fine. You might feel bad about yourself but now: Forgive yourself. It's not your fault, nor theirs. You just don't match each other. You just a person with imperfections.
And if somebody does not want you, there are 7,5 billion other people wandering out there. Maybe one of them needs you a lot now. yes, like..a lot.
What to keep in mind is: Let them like you for being you.
And sometimes we might feel like hoping for feedback when we do anything nice to people, but they just don't give us any. So we become more apathy to them because we learn that they never give their heart back to you. Making it worse, they don't feel any burden about it. Speaking the truth that they never care about your feeling? But hey, you make your own heartache, babe. You make expectations so that's why you feel disappointed when it does not happen. Is it wrong to make expectation? Well, it's actually natural. It depends on how we control it, just make less attention to their feedback and focus on your actions. Say to yourself: You do it because you want to. You do not need their feedback nor appreciation. You do it for you, you do nice things to make yourself happy. And that's all. You could be a little happier creature in this earth.
Believe me, someday, somewhere, and from someone you probably don't expect, your good deeds will come back to you.
Allah is the best planners.
What to keep in mind is: make less attention to people's feedback and focus on your actions.
(to be continued..
making mistakes; face problems; judging people )
Just my personal opinion as one little part of the society. Would love to hear more opinions or maybe some social experiences from you. :)
Have a good day.
Chusna A.
The World is a great mirror and reflects back to you what you are - Vibre the Proporsito
tags:
how to have and develop good social skills, how to be sociable, deal with society, ways to improve social skill, face social problem, social issues, social matters, learn social skill, become yourself, self healing, definition of society, social skill development, social life, social problem example, social problem solving, society meaning, society quotes, tips, how to handle yourself, tolerate others, become adaptable, control your feeling, forgive yourself, facing problems, make mistake, love yourself, build social lif, social experiences, social network
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